Forthcoming, I promise

20/2 edit: I was going to take this post down after I posted the day’s lesson, especially since my dad emailed me yesterday afternoon to suggest that I was on the verge of going completely off the rails and turning the blog into one giant rant. But my mother (strangely) found it funny, as did the friend in Texas who had the joy of talking to me in the closing minutes of the game, so I’ve decided to leave it.

There was learning, but my day kind of got away from me yesterday. In my normal life, I post after I watch the early hockey game, which in my world ends later than I should probably still be awake, but I’m kind of a vampire (in the hours I keep, I mean…I don’t actually think I’m a vampire), but I’m usually up for another hour or so after the early game is over. Longer if my west coast team is playing and I can sleep in the next day.

Anyway, last night was the Canada/Switzerland game, the last 30 minutes of which, I literally spent lying on the floor, trying to keep my blood pressure from making my heart explode, wishing I could reach through my screen and punch the commentators* in the throat — so much so that I conceded to a friend in a major city in the Mid-Atlantic that I’d gladly trade them for Joe Buck, whom I abhor with every ounce of my being — because every word out of their mouths was more absurd than the one before, reminding myself to breathe, trying not to shout at the game (or the commentators) because my housemates keep normal people hours and were sleeping, and swearing to one of my closest friends, who just moved to a city in Texas that I have never been to, that I was going to be sick.

I’m not joking.

I always forget this because my teams so rarely make the playoffs of anything, but I really suck at watching important sporting events in which I have a vested interest. Especially if the game is close. And the team you’re cheering for is starting to remind you of your horribly inept regular season team. And they can’t seem to buy a goal, no matter how hard they try.

So yeah, the next few hours after that were spent not writing a post. Instead, they were spent trying to bring my blood pressure back down.

You’ll have a post soon.

*For the first three games the terribleness of the commentators was hilarious. I swear on my life, I heard the following statement in yesterday’s US/Norway game: “they’re referring to him as a swan or a mother goose, gliding across and making himself look big.” Do you have any idea what that means, because I don’t. They were talking about Ryan Miller, if that helps. Oh, it doesn’t? Yeah, I didn’t think it would. Anyway…their ineptitude was hilarious for three games. It stopped being hilarious when they started getting on my favourite player in the middle of the FIRST PERIOD for not scoring a hat trick like he did in the game against Norway on Tuesday. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!? It’s not like he wasn’t feeding the puck well or putting himself in front of the goal (both of which he was doing). But that was irrelevant because he hadn’t scored three goals in the first ten minutes of play. It was even less hilarious when at the end of the second period they were packing the entire competition in for Canada. YOU NONSENSICALLY COMPARED RYAN MILLER TO A GOOSE! YOU DON’T GET TO DECIDE CANADA HAVE IMPLODED WITH A FULL THIRD OF THE GAME YET TO PLAY! There’s a word for that where I live. It’s “wankers.”

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One thought on “Forthcoming, I promise

  1. Rachel says:

    You’re a vampire?… Does this mean you sparkle in the sun? *head implodes*

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